Archive for 'Funny Stories'
Only in Australia Men shoot each other ‘to see if it hurts’
Published on June 24th, 2010.
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when you fire a anti tank rocket launcher it might be loud
Published on June 10th, 2010.
So you join the army to be touch and strong
Common sense says that firing a anti tank rocket launcher might be loud but when familiarizing and then testing the troops on the employment and engagement of an AT4 some fo the troops get a big shock
Filled under Funny Stories, Miscellaneous, Wierd and Interesting. 4 Comments.
Have you ever been hit in the nuts by a cannon ?
Published on June 9th, 2010.
Everyone looks like they are really worried about him, well i suppose its his fault
Filled under Funny Stories, Groin Hits, Kicked in the ding ding, Painful Moments. No Comments.
Power lines use wood its not conductive
Published on June 3rd, 2010.
Received this in my inbox !!! ouch
When I was in aviation electronics school in the service, my instructor began his class on ‘Insulators’ with this observation: “Wood is a non-conductor, right? Well don’t you believe it!”
He had purchased an acre of property that was covered in fast-growing poplar trees, each about five inches thick and twenty feet tall. Axe in hand, he set out to clear the yard. His wife expressed concern about the high voltage power lines that passed along the edge of the lot, but he assured her that there was nothing to worry about. Wood is non-conductive.
A few minutes later one of his “mighty blows” felled a tree, which toppled directly onto the power lines. He stood there transfixed as the blue electricity snaked down the tree trunk and up the axe handle, and blew him twenty feet across the yard. Fortunately his wife and daughter witnessed the event and rushed him to the hospital, where he was treated for third degree burns on palms and soles, where the electricity entered and exited his body. He stayed in the hospital for two weeks, until his arms quit shaking uncontrollably.
Wood is non-conductive, right? Don’t you believe it!
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Bike helmet, zombies and a sledge hammer what more could you want
Published on May 31st, 2010.
A story of power of the human head or maybe the strength of mind !!
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Bub and I are great fans of zombie movies, and have passed many a late night in front of the T.V. with popcorn and DVDs. Ever since reading the ‘Zombie Survival Guide’ by Max Brooks, Bub is convinced that hordes of the undead will one day rise up. While trying to convince me of the impending apocalypse, Bub cited two facts that I found to be in error.
1) the human skull is one of the hardest surfaces in nature.
2) a medieval mace lacks the stopping power to crush it.
We argued these points for half an hour, without coming to an agreement.
The next morning Bub texted me to come over and settle the issue. He answered the door wearing his cycle helmet and led me to his backyard, where he handed me a lump-hammer (a small sledge-hammer) and told me to hit him over the head. I don’t know if the helmet would have stopped the hammer blow or not, and I wasn’t about to try it on my friend. Instead I devised a simple experiment, hoping to avoid any nasty injuries.
Bub and I went to the supermarket to buy two coconuts, one for the experiment and one because I really like coconut. We returned to Bub’s house and proceeded to place a coconut on the paving in his back yard. I picked up the lump-hammer and with one solid blow, reduced the coconut to delicious shrapnel. As I was clearing up the shards of nutty goodness, I said, “If that was your head, you’d be dead.”
I turned to see Bub trying to validate my theory by headbutting the second coconut as hard as he could. Bub was fine after a few stitches, thankfully not a Darwin this time–but I’ll keep you posted.
Incidentally, Bub was vindicated. He did manage to crack the nut. Since he proved that his skull is indeed harder than a coconut, my experiment was inconclusive.
Reader comment: The unbearable hardness of being.
http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1994-28.html
Filled under Funny Stories, Kicked in the ding ding, Miscellaneous, Painful Moments, Wierd and Interesting. No Comments.
Great balls of fire, well a big bang anyway
Published on May 29th, 2010.
(10 January 2009, Pennsylvania) An embarrassed and seriously injured 17-year-old initially claimed that an explosive had been planted in his backpack by persons unknown. However, police investigators soon extracted the truth from the feckless teen.He found an M-80 explosive at his grandmother’s house, took it to his room to examine it, and began to repeatedly light and extinguish the fuse. During one of these cycles the fuse would not go out, so he jammed the red cardboard tube between his thighs and covered it with his hand to muffle the explosion. This plan was less successful than he had hoped.
Commonly thought to be a quarter stick of dynamite, M80’s (according to pyrouniverse.com) actually contain flash powder rather than TNT, and only 1/50 the amount–just under 3 grams. Used by the U.S. Military to simulate grenade explosions, M80’s were outlawed in 1966 under the Child Protection Act.
They are not safe enough to be detonated by the average man on the average street, let alone by the average 17-year-old. One loud KABOOM! later, our junior pyrotechnics specialist had lost his right hand, right leg, and–very likely–his right to reproduce, earning him a living Darwin Award.
http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2009-23.html
Filled under Funny Stories, Groin Hits, Kicked in the ding ding, Painful Moments, Wierd and Interesting. 1 Comment.
Who knew University professors had a sense of humour !!
Published on May 23rd, 2010.
The college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing his class, and that there would be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student’s immediate family. A smart ass student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up. “But what about extreme sexual exhaustion, professor?” As you would expect, the class exploded in laughter. When the students had finally settled down, the professor froze the young man with a glaring look. “Well,” he responded, “I guess you’ll just have to learn to write with your other hand.”
Filled under Funny Stories, Wierd and Interesting. 2 Comments.
Cindarella left him at midnight now we know what happened after the ball
Published on May 20th, 2010.
There are some pretty stupid criminals out there. Yet this excerpt from a Washington Post article proves that not all criminals are dumb – in fact, some are so clever that the Post labeled this article, “The Best Comeback Line Ever”
In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m. on Friday.
Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.
The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop. “You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn’t,” he stated in a phone interview.
Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, Picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his need. “I guess I was just really into it, you know?” he commented with evident embarrassment.
In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until Officer Brenda Taylor approached him. “It was an unusual situation, that’s for sure,” said Officer Taylor. “I walked up to (Lawrence) and he’s… just working away at this pumpkin.”
Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence. “I just went up and said, ‘Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?’ He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight in the face and said, ‘A pumpkin? Darn…is it midnight already?”
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Trying to get kicked in the nuts ! no-one does that right!
Published on May 15th, 2010.
Your would be wrong, a stunt to get people kick him in the nuts
GOing for the record of getting kicked in the ding ding nuts or whatever you wnat to call it !!
This is insane, at least theres some people who wont do it, but those who just take to much pleasure in this
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Google Introducing Translate for Animals (beta): Bridging the gap between animals and humans
Published on April 1st, 2010.
Be one of the first to try the new app from google
Making the world’s information universally accessible is a key goal for Google. Language is one of our biggest challenges so we have targeted our efforts on removing language barriers between the species. We are excited to introduce Translate for Animals, an Android application which we hope will allow us to better understand our animal friends. We’ve always been a pet-friendly company at Google, and we hope that Translate for Animals encourages greater interaction and understanding between animal and human.
Keep up to date at the animal translate site
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